Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize