we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Randomize
