I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
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the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
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You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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