Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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