what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
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The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
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The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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