when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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