Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize