Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
