had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
