She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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