1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
