My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
