Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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