A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
