it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
