there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize