yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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