Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...

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(309): View more from Illinois

i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!

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(517): View more from Michigan

the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.

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(801): View more from Utah

The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts

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27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
Read it at the TFLN blog
(404): View more from Georgia

Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.

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(678): View more from Georgia

So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina

(404): View more from Georgia

I'm teaching my cat to play fetch

(678): View more from Georgia

Yep, it's a friday

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(425): View more from Washington

The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.

(541): View more from Oregon

Mole people?

(425): View more from Washington

Mole people

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.

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(770): View more from Georgia

Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.

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