I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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