my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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