everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
