Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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