Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?

  (469): View more from Texas

  Ya, why?

  (972): View more from Texas

  We should try that some time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (972): Remember that sex scene from American Psycho? (469): Ya, why? (972): We should try that some time. http://tfl.nu/72x3
  Replies (10) Good night (1201) Bad night (622)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass. http://tfl.nu/0fum
  Replies (48) Good night (971) Bad night (3025)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America." http://tfl.nu/2jbp
  Replies (24) Good night (6642) Bad night (849)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there. http://tfl.nu/1912
  Replies (7) Good night (6153) Bad night (1074)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead http://tfl.nu/5uyo
  Replies (14) Good night (756) Bad night (2653)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens. http://tfl.nu/uou3
  Replies (8) Good night (2437) Bad night (1277)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I think the camel was justified in biting me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): I think the camel was justified in biting me. http://tfl.nu/yr0l
  Replies (8) Good night (1652) Bad night (634)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year. http://tfl.nu/zp0f
  Replies (3) Good night (1296) Bad night (837)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour. http://tfl.nu/zhs1
  Replies (4) Good night (2518) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet? http://tfl.nu/5htr
  Replies (2) Good night (1384) Bad night (332)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling... http://tfl.nu/2dyo
  Replies (2) Good night (616) Bad night (332)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard. http://tfl.nu/ybia
  Replies (17) Good night (2505) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (386): Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it. http://tfl.nu/ijpo
  Replies (6) Good night (400) Bad night (513)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science" http://tfl.nu/nwfg
  Replies (0) Good night (564) Bad night (233)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck http://tfl.nu/odm7
  Replies (3) Good night (407) Bad night (132)

Randomize