Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
kristin has been a bad kristin
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
