Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
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