OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
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