yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Randomize
