I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
"it" just moved
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Randomize