i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
And then he peed in my hair
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