Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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