remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
He's a Shit stain on my heart
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
