Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize