Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
