Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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