I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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