Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
try to milk me bitch
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