I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You're a waste of cheezeits
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Randomize
