What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize