"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
