my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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