I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Randomize
