So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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