One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
