Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
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