Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
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Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize