it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize