so that wasnt chicken after all
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize