I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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