i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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