Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Two words: blizzard sex
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize