Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
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